Teditorial: What is wrong with Piolo

Posted at 12/05/11 10:49 PM

Rumors and speculations keep swirling a week after KC Concepcion bared the real score about her relationship with Piolo Pascual. In tonight's Teditorial Teddy Locsin Jr. shares his thoughts on the very public break-up of 2 of show business's most desirable stars. - The World Tonight, ANC, December 5, 2011

As only Boy Abunda can make you do, KC Concepcion bared her soul on his show.

Last year, KC and Piolo officially became... what? Man and wife? Noooo. Lovers? Maybe.

Until quite recently, KC had no idea what a bisexual relationship entailed.

She was raised in Paris after all. Today they are no longer an item.

Piolo courted her since she was 18. He came, to be sure, but he also went. And when he went, he stayed away, pretty much.

Could he take her only in small doses? Was he still thinking whether to take their relationship a step further than the scripted talk of a Paris show?

So far, I see nothing wrong. Piolo was showing remarkable self-control, given KC's stunning good looks.

Maybe each was too good for the other. To say he is a sight for sore eyes is a gross understatement. To say she is a pretty woman barely scratches her surface.

Yet, despite delay, she said yes when he popped the question. What was the question? Will you be my GF? Just that?

Still what girl would say no. She said he was "soooo gooood" but only as in "mabait."

During all the time he kept her waiting, there was talk. Didn't she listen to the talk? Would a woman in Piolo's arms?

Besides, others were telling him she was no good for him also. Between people talking and each other, the latter was the preferred option.

But when two objects of the world's desire come other, do they attract or repel?

A year passed, did anything change? She did, KC said. There were things she would do, things she could not.

Remember, KC is not a lawyer who will do things even rats won't do.

What things? Well... things.

KC said she just kept giving and giving. She did not say if he kept taking and taking. Nor what it was she was giving and he taking -- or not.

We'd like to be on the receiving end of that exchange but no such luck.

She learned a lot but it wasn't supposed to be that way. What way was that?

She thought the problem would go away, but realized, at least during commercial breaks, she said, that Piolo would not.

And whatever it was that made Piolo so problematic, it drove her to the bathroom, she said.

My God. He was like typhoid.

She and Piolo are no longer an item. Why?

With great reluctance yet also alacrity she said, tears running down her fabulous complexion, and I quote, "What i was looking for was napaka-basic that women look for from a boyfriend, from a man."


I am well over 60 years old, I have been there, done that, and so have my sad friends.

A man may fool himself that he has something unique that women want and no other man can give, but believe me, whatever it is women hunger for, it is not attached to a man.

All that verticality gets repetitive and impossible to tell apart.

True, a Prada is not one of a kind but it is pretty damned expensive. And, unlike a coin purse made out of foreskin, you can show it around.

KC said she could take anything, even that he has children.

Mutual friends warned her that Piolo is an inveterate begetter. Like God said his descendants would be as stars in the sky and sand in the sea.

Is Piolo's real name Abraham? Yet KC took it better than Sarah took Hagar the Egyptian.

Was there a third party? Well, Piolo couldn't be doing the begetting by himself, could he? Like Jupiter giving birth to Venus off the top of his head.

Is she angry? Pretty much, KC said. She feels cheapened. Why?

It seems he laughs everytime he is asked about their relationship. Worse, he laughs every time she talks.

There is clearly something wrong with Piolo, but it is in no way connected to his sexual bias but rather to his funny bone. It is way out of control.

If there is anything a woman wants even more than Prada, it is for a man not to laugh at her.

Asked in turn what he had to say about KC's revelations, Piolo said, "Well, she's said her piece," and broke into a smile again.

That was all. This Piolo is a pretty cool customer.